Players 12 August

It’s the 2nd Ashes match of the season and the weather is amazingly hot … Richard called incorrectly as usual but Roger took pity on us and put us in to bat.  Paul J and Chris opened up against some very tight bowling by J Langridge and Shercliff, putting on 26 until Paul was caught off JL trying to force the pace.  Richard came in and surveyed the field, reckoning there were some sharp singles to be had.  Unfortunately he didn’t bother telling Chris this and set off as Chris blocked one down by his toes.  The surprised man of Kent stood still then (I could almost hear the crazy drum roll) spun his feet around like The Ant Hill Mob from the Wacky Races before sliding over.  The Players seemed perplexed by all this mullarkey and the ball seemed to be taking a tour of North London before arriving at the end Chris seemed to be trying to swim towards.  “Get up you’ll still make it” shouted Richard to the stricken Chris.  Chris reasoned on his way back to the boundary that he’d been run out deliberately for slow scoring.  Two points:  1 we don’t have that luxury and 2 I don’t know whether to laugh or cry that someone could think I’d be that much of a b*st*rd.  Oh well I then got a faint inside edge on a good delivery from Shercliff that the umpire didn’t hear and was back on my way to the boundary as well.  Instant Karma?  Boll*cks.  Anyway Paul B was skittled soon after by Shercliff and at 35-4 we weren’t looking too shiny.  Jim Campbell and Toby put on 23 as Roger and Ghost came into the attack, Jim being stumped by by T Langridge off Michael (anyone really surprised?  No I thought not).  Roger pinned Toby against his stumps and it’s 65-6.  Oh come on I want that urn back!  As 2 of the wickets down instead of 1 are my fault I’m kicking the turf in frustration.  Jeff was looking good until Friend took a good catch off Roger then the Players’ skipper had 2-Bats trapped in front.  Mick spent less time at the crease than he would have liked (one ball) as the elegant ulsterman continued his devastating spell rattling Mick’s timbers.  Mick had another go as we were one short and got 5 this time before Ghost claimed his second wicket – Roger taking the catch proving what an excellent fellow he is as it denied him the chance of a 5-for.

Salmagundi Gardeners   111 all out in 28 overs
Paul Jordan   c T Langridge b J Langridge   16
Chris Packham   run out   5
Richard Higginbottom   lbw Shercliff   1
Paul Brasted   b Shercliff   2
Jim Campbell   st T Langridge b Callaghan   21
Toby Frow   lbw McCann   8
Jeff Round   c Friend b McCann   8
David Hollingsworth   lbw McCann   4
Mick Campbell   b McCann   0
Stuart Bruce   not out   2
MC Again   c McCann b Callaghan   5
Extras   11

Tea was excellent, featuring a home made cake by Ghost.  Top class Michael, thanks very much.  Let’s try to restore some pride now Gardeners.

Mick and Jim both bowled beautifully beating the bat on several occasions and testing the technique of the Players openers T Langridge and Sweet who stood up to the test very well until Sweet missed a super in swinger from Jim to be lbw for 10.  Mick wasn’t to be outdone and immediately bowled Cooper for 1.  Toby took over from Jim and bowled T Langridge for 21.  Friend and Wylie dug in to edge the Players towards the win, but Toby bowled with great heart, trapping Friend lbw as the score approached our meagre total.  At the scores being level the field was pulled in and Richard put Stuart into short leg and made his only sound decision of the day as Wylie obligingly popped up a rising ball from Toby into Stuart’s hands.  Too little too late unfortunately and the urn stays in pineapple territory until 2013.  Well played gents.

The Players   85 for 5   off   19.2 overs
T J Langridge   b Frow   21
S G Sweet   lbw J Campbell   10
W D B Cooper   b M Campbell   1
J S G wylie   c Bruce b Frow   17
R J Friend   lbw Frow   9
R A C Humes   not out   6
M Shercliff   not out   0
Extras   17

The Players won by 5 wickets.

Roger entertained the local girls in The Vine later by spilling a copious amount of alcohol over his groin area.  Crazy Paul has a picture that we’ll publicise in due course.  Richard said “I need to leave” 90 minutes before going.  The silent treatment I got at home later was an added bonus.

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